You imagine yourself in a fantasy, where you go places and do things together. He/she is romantic, loving, kind, and does exactly what you want when you want it.The only problem is, this person doesn’t actually exist.A relationship is just an extension of the economic model.You have something he/she wants, and he/she has something you want (sex, companionship, etc.) As a result, the both of you benefit each other.There are just so many things that can change that particular possibility. All your planning has been focused on the two of you being together, so when the unexpected happens, you have no alternate plan! Say there were no people in the world, what would you do?This is when people sit at home crying, blaming the other person for not fulfilling their dreams. Now say there were 2 people in the world, what would you do?If that is the case, then of course the relationship would feel like the center of the world to you, as you are deriving most of your identity from your partner.It would also explain why you would feel very hurt and angry when your partner leaves, since he/she took away all that stuff you were getting.
You tried a particular trade and it didn’t work out.
Sure, you’ll feel a loss, but you’ll still have something pretty great to return to.
That is the key to a healthy relationship actually, since even in a relationship, you’ll be alone some portion of the time.
Just stop thinking about it and start doing the things you love. You’ll never get into a relationship again and do the things you love until you die. That’s because not knowing creates a lot of uncertainity in situations, which paralyzes you.
For example, let’s say you just had a date and you sit around wondering when the other person would call.